Paint It, Black

torino10154 broke Alan Rickman's twitter page!

*dies laughing*

I am attempting to blow some dust off and get back in the groove of writing. I got this idea from reading an old The New Yorker and took a stab at it. It's short and silly, I mostly wrote it because it made me giggle. I will have two other fics up shortly for red_day_dawning and mindabbles, and by shortly I mean within a week.

Title: Remus Lupin is Straight *nods*
Author/Artist: gryffindorj
Rating: R
Pairing(s)/character(s): Remus mostly Remus/Sirius with a bit of Remus/Marlene McKinnon and Remus/Tonks
Summary: Being born a straight male in a society that constantly encouraged Remus Lupin to be homosexual was not easy.
Word Count:~1000
Disclaimer: I do not own anything except some pervy thoughts but I make nothing from those or sharing them with others.
Warnings: Cracky
Notes: No beta or anything so all mistakes are my own, it's just for fun anyway. Thanks to torino10154 for her generous help.

( Remus Lupin is Straight *nods* )

Anyone else watch Heroes?
( Cut for spoilers and I am upset about what happened )

The quiz was a lot more fun than I thought it would be. It's interesting to see how fanon and the movies have blurred the lines in our thinking. My "grading system" was a bit weird so if you want argue about it feel free but don't expect me to change :-). Each multiple choice question was worth one point, on the two choose the answer questions each correct answer was worth a point but if you picked incorrectly you lost a point.

( Answers and Winner )

I am going to close the quiz tomorrow and post the winner(s) and answers, OK? If you want your result comment and I will tell you and screen it incase you don't want others to see.

Everyone take note of the icon. That icon is up because as a group the people I know to be Snupiners are doing that best. What the hell R/S people!?!?! All you Snarry people I know you don't give a shit about canon so you guys as a group are doing all right.

am looking for a little shot of fandom fun, so I made a little canon quiz. By canon I mean only the material contained within the books, JKR quotes aren't canon and the movies sure as hell aren't either. Take a moment to take the quiz and I will tell your score in a reply. The winner will receive a prize!

Rules:
1) No using the Harry Potter books
2) Do not use Lexicon
3) Do not use a friend
4) Only your own brain power
5) Honor system please

Link to my LJ because I made the poll over there

It's been a crazy week so I am trying to catch up.

1) Anything I missed and need to see/read right away?

2) It was my darling titheniel's birthday on the first, and I remembered but it was a hell of day so I forgot to say something before I collapsed into bed. tith is the wonderful kinky lady who introduced me to the delights of Supernatural *puts up Jensen icon for her*, she's a J2 goddess, wonderfully opinionated and is so damned loving (she's also deliciously sexy). I hope you had a fantastic birthday darling!!! *KISSES*

3) James had her first football (USA read: soccer) game today. She's only three and basically I signed her up to burn off energy, but she's a pretty focused girl and isn't afraid to in there and take the ball away (Hee! She proves once again she's a James). There is also a little boy on her team who stubbornly refuses to have anything to do with the game, I thought it was adorable his dad didn't find it so cute.

4) torino10154 is leaving town for a week so maybe I can get something done instead of goofing off for hours each day with her. Speaking of torino not all of you may know this but she takes her mother in-law grocery shopping once a week. Her mother in-law has lived in America for over twenty years and doesn't speak English. I asked torino once if her mother in-law could actually speak English if she wanted to but refuses and torino basically said that could be the case. But hopefully her mother in-law doesn't understand the English so well because on Friday while with her mother in-law she was on the phone with me talking about getting spanked and a recent toy purchase. Also when torino speaks Italian she sounds equally pissed off as when she speaks English.

5) I'm behind on hp10k_showcase, this is perhaps because I am a bit Drarried out. I want to get some hp_springsmut read before reveals tomorrow so 10k will have to wait. midnitemaraud_r please hold off on reveals till at least late tomorrow, ok?

6) Drarry turned 2 months old this week. I wanted to take a picture so I first tried to tame her hair with a wet comb, total failure. Then right before I got the camera out she was in a happy mood, the minute I wanted her to stay happy she reverted back to her "fuck you" look. Hee! Drarry proves her namesake again too.

7) Slumdog Millionaire is a fantastic movie, I cried it was so wonderful.

8) *sigh* It's been too long since I have chatted with some of you. *sad sigh*

9) I have writers blerg which is different than writers block. Block is when you can't write anything, blerg is when all you write is shit. This week I had a breakthrough with my Big Bang Blackout, let's hope the trend stays.

10) Anything else I failed to mention?

I meant to post this awhile ago, like the day after the Presidential Inauguration and am just getting around to it. I saw this picture and couldn't help but wonder why Kingsley left the UK and works as Secret Service for Obama or possibly some other job for Obama?



See him there on the left? It's almost like canon because he was the Prime Minister's secretary. I am going Secret Service thought, would you want to mess with him?

Yesterday wizard_love reveals went up. I recieved a lovely Luna/Charlie from eeyore9990, Luna is an especially difficult character to write properly and so I am even more pleased with the gift because eey did a wonderful job with her!

I also wrote for the fest and my fic is bellow. This was the fic I wrote that I whinged and whinged about. When I whinged I had only received one comment and that was from torino10154 who doesn't count because she knew it was mine. Since then I have received some lovely comments so I feel a bit better about it all. I also got a rec from shellydkitty and I actually cried because anon recs are the best and I was feeling really low about the whole thing. I have decided that it's most likely the pairing people find off putting, but if you can stomach het, feel free to read and leave me some concrit. I would love to know what I could have done to make the story better as I really like it and think perhaps I am a bit blind to my own faults.

Title:Disappearing Act
Author:gryffindorj
Recipient's IJ/LJ name:
 My person dropped out but I would like to think she would have enjoyed this.
Rating:
R
Pairing(s): James/Narcissa, with mentions of James/Lily and Lucius/Narcissa

Word Count:
~8300
Warnings (if any):
 Not a one, other than the rating.
Authors notes: The request I got had one suggestion for a fic where Narcissa was manipulating James and maybe they got into something they couldn't control. I loved that idea so this is what I came up with. Many many thanks to my beta midnightblue88 who I love.

( Disappearing Act )

brighty18 is playing "Cliff" on her LJ right now and I wanted to play along. I was asked to post my answer here so that I could over to all the people needing something to do a chance to play the game. If you want to play let me know and I will give you three people.

Basically the game is you are given three people and one you drop off a cliff, one you shag and one you marry. You know all in your head and stuff. So brighty, because she knew this would be a tough one for me, gave me Remus, Sirius and James.

Remus would have to be dropped off a cliff because he is oh so very gay. I wouldn't want him to be miserable being forced into het like he was in DH.

Sirius I would shag as he's not the sort to be tide down--unless you know it's foreplay or something.

That means slightly by default I would marry James Potter. Hee! Which shouldn't come as shock as I've taken that Harry Potter husband test like a zillion times and get James every single time. I like handsome full of themselves smarty pants athletic types so it works well. Plus dark hair *drools* and anyone who has seen my baby could easily see the Potter resemblance.

On the risk of getting my ass beat I would like to post this video:



Don't worry darling you don't really need the lesson as you have me to clean it up for you. You've been cleaning me up for ages. However, I had to post it because I just love to bother you.

I pulled the trigger and signed up for a facebook. I did it only after I talked to my long time friend and I found out my best friend torino10154 had one. I mostly did it to read my siblings facebooks because they are on there all the time, I don't ever expect to put up much myself. But I still can't believe I have a facebook, I loathe things like that. If I wanted to talk to people from my past I would still be talking to them. There is a reason my past is my past. *goes to find old boyfriends* ETA: It ridiculous how quickly that task was accomplished. And I seem to be the only person that doesn't watch American Idol.

I watched Gone Baby Gone last night. Ben Affleck wrote the screenplay and directed it, his brother Casey was the lead actor in it. After watching the movie it made me think that Ben really has no place in front of a camera the movie was awesome and he should direct more and stop the shit acting he does. Casey, however, is an AWESOME actor and I would like to see him in more films. I don't recommend the film to everyone, I am surprised I ever got through it. It's pretty rough at some points and I bawled like a baby at the end. Kind of cryptic because I don't want to spoil it if you haven't seen it; I was so PISSED off at the end. I did not agree with Patrick's decision at all! Anyone else seen it and want to discuss?

Last thing. I am plotting out my Sirius Big Bang fic, can't say much because it has to be secret but torino10154 is a fucking genius for her idea! WOOT!

ETA: I tried to find an icon to load on my facebook that was neither Harry Potter related or porny--turns out I don't have one of those. LOL

My Netflix queue is looking a little anemic so I need some suggestions on what I should add to it.

Speaking of movies my husband made me watch OotP the other night *rolls eyes*. However we were talking about Kingsley when the scene in the kitchen at Grimmauld Place was going on. I pondered out loud about why everyone loves him so much. My husband said it was because he had a huge cock, so huge he couldn't even sit up in his chair straight because he had to give it room to breath. If you watch the scene you will notice Kingsley is sitting very relaxed the whole time. I'm not sure if I should love my husband for this or start changing all my passwords as obviously he has somehow found out all my thoughts about the size of Kingsley's cock.

For those of you who haven't read "The White Road" first of all what the hell is wrong with you? Second, I just rec'd it at my LJ so go read the rec then read the fic.

I am so excited for this fest! Not only because the person running it is made of win but because I REALLY want to see Sirius whored out. Not that I don't love Remus/Sirius, I'm just really picky about the pairing and get a little tired of it. So everyone start considering the fun you could have slutting Sirius up!

Hello all. This is torino10154 posting on gryffindorj's behalf. I haven't spoken with her yet but her husband sent an email with the details (9:55 AM her time, 6 lbs. 12 oz, 20.5 inches long) and that mom and baby are doing well. To quote from his message, "Our doctor reckons she is perfect."

That's all for now. I'm sure she can't wait to get out of the hospital and start reading porn again. :D

I'm supposed to have this baby this week if everything goes according to plan. So let me take care of some business before I suddenly vanish.

1) ATTENTION: People who had for me for wizard_love and hpvalensmut if the fic/art comes up from me and you don't hear from me for a bit it's because I most likely had a baby. So please don't worry I will get to piece as soon as I can to give it all the love I am sure it deserves.

2) Care instructions for torino10154: I am relying on some of you to babysit her while I am away. I know it's a really BIG job so if you divide up the work it could possibly be managed. Besides feeding her and watering her on a regular basis she will also need the following:
-To be laughed at any time he woes get the better of her
-A regular dose of smutty fic and art
-Conversations revolving around cocks, pricks and arses, and also how to never use any word to describe the female bits.
-She will also need someone to be delicately blunt with her. So when she whinges about all these fests she signed up for and the due dates and betas and brit!pickers and writing time and ect. You will need to tell her that no one held a gun to her head when she signed up for the fest.
- Incase of emergency break glass and hand her a bottle of vodka, but never tequila as it gives her a monster hang-over.

3) For the first time in a VERY long time I have nothing on the table for fics. My wizard love should be turned in by tonight 20 minutes and my valensmut is already in, and now that's it. Since it is anonymous I have to be careful what I say but the two featured characters in my stories are people I don't write enough of but I LOVE them dearly so I really hope they turned out well!

5) My next plan is to do the Sirius big bang thing that red_squared is planning, and good God I have three bunnies in mind and the winning one is HET! That is unless I am needed to PH for anything, but I saw yesterday that xylodemon signed up to PH at valensmut and hp_springsmut which if the mods are smart *cough* they should have her PH every possible story they can. She is ah-mazing /fangirling

6) My husband has been pissing me off all weekend and he knows it. I seriously thought about strangling him with the flowers he sent me because he knew he was in trouble.

7) *loves f-list*

I was just going to post a very whiney post about my husband but then I read this POST at the hp10k_showcase, and felt like such a whiney shit that I decided you should all go read that post instead. So go.

PS torino10154 grab a tissue before you read.

Have you ever read a fic that everyone in fandom is all "OMG I LURVE THIS SO MUUUUUUUUUCH!!! IT'S THE GREATEST STORY EVER TOLD ABOUT THIS PAIRING AND IT'S AMAAAAAAAAAZING!!! OH AUTHOR I WANT TO GO DOWN ON YOU BECAUSE I LUUUUUUUUUURVE THIS FIC SO MUCH. *SNOGS AUTHOR*", and you see it rec'd everywhere. You've read the fic and it's a pairing you like but you don't see what everyone else sees. And then like a bad penny it keeps coming back again and again. Has this ever happened to any of you?

I'm a little bit in the mood to do something pointless so why not a meme! I took this from the brilliant blpaintchart, who is currently nursing a long term injury she sustained while wanking.

Empire Magazine has revealed its list of the 50 Greatest TV Shows ever.(Let me insert here I have a bit of an issue with the word "ever" as they seem to have forgotten several decades of tv AND some of these shows were good at the start but totally blow now.)
1. Bold the shows you watch/used to watch.
2. Italicize the shows you've seen at least one episode of.
3. Underline the shows you own on DVD (at least one season).
4. Post your answers.

( When you see this no one is going to believe I only watch 4 hours of tv a week, and that would be a MAXIMUM amount. It's usually closer to 2 hours. )